mercredi, octobre 06, 2004
hi ppl.. im pretty moody siahx.. perhaps it's because of how i was being 'treated' today bahx.. he jus din bother to say hi.. pretended that i m invisible *as though i've mastered the art of being an invisible lady*.. n jus walked past.. somehow i've really regretted.. i shldnt have said tt sentence even tho he bucked me to say it.. wells.. whatever's done it's done.. tried getting e frenship back too.. yeah of cos.. he said it's okay already.. is he lying to make me feel better or what? cos if it's really okay.. he'll say hi to me right? anyways.. he dun wanna say hi den dun hi lohx..
another thing is also tt.. how does it feel like to be scolded by someone u like and the kinda words he used is really unpleasant to the ears.. eg.. j**k.. ok.. it hurts.. it definitely hurt.. i never thought tt someone would actually use such a word to scold me. yes it's been long since he used this word.. yes i almost forgot abt it.. but somehow the way he ignored me today.. make me recall of how he scolded me.. yea.. being scolded by someone u like.. anyways.. i think i should change e word to.. used to like.. yeah i doubt i still like him.. i dun think i'll like someone who always scold me.. do u?
yes ppl has been wanting to know me here n there.. yeah i feel satisfied n wanted.. haha.. but pls.. it's jus a feeling.. no interest present. i doubt i'll even dare get into a relationship. yes i do wonder how e feeling is like.. but still i dun dare. thinking of the hurt n stuffs.. i seriously dun wanna get hurt anymore.. i dun wanna know e 'wrong' person and then tt's it. it's an obstacle in life tt i have to get over with. it aint easy.. and now for me to like someone.. guess it's pretty difficult.. im jus so scared of hurt.. yes some may say tt e happiness u get is really wonderful.. then what abt the hurt? the sadness? it's also e worst right? dun u agree? perhaps it aint e time for me to think abt this now.. im jus quite bothered abt some stuffs.. sianz..
jus to share a story ive heard ytd.. from 933.. ying1 yue4 ri4 ji4.. music diary.. yeah this is e only time i love to switch to 933 to listen to ppl's story.. n this guy.. he copy e story from a book.. e story is smth like this..
"this gal and guy they were together for 10 yrs.. n the guy everytime is only busy abt proj.. n this time he told her,' after this proj i shall think about our marriage' but the gal.. she replied.. 'i think we should break.. reason being.. u are always busy with ur proj and never really care for me'.. e guy, of cos, he's sad too.. he tried calling the gal n such.. but the gal jus kept quiet n did not tok to him.. n e last time he called her.. he said 'i din know tt i cause so much sadness to you..' and with this.. he hung up the call.. n that is the last fone call ever.. after a few days the gal left.. she went to australia to relax.. n get away from her probs.. she came back 6mths later.. of cos.. after not paying electricity bill n water bill.. her supply were all cut off.. she came back.. went to the nearest public fone and called the guy.. the line was connected.. it's his sis who answered the call.. she sounded a lil uncomfortable when hearing the gal's voice.. 'may i speak to ur bro pls?'.... 'erm.. erm.. he no longer stay with us already..' his sis replied.... the gal was shocked n asked why.. 'cos he jus got married last week... n moved out already..'.. by now.. e gal realised that what she truly needed was jus someone who cared for her..
the dJ den said some stuffs.. she said.. true love.. many of us yearn for true love, passionate love, a fairytale like love.. yes.. but do this love exist?? no.. sometimes.. simple love is good enough.. often.. ppl go around looking for a more suitable partner and someone who is more loving more passionate.. they look for things which they cant find in their own bf/gf.. they think they could find a better one.. a more perfect one.. and gave up a relationship which is so simple n pure.. no one can ever be so perfect.. when u always tend to look for a better person to have all e qualities ur other half dun have.. n overlook the good qualities ur other half has.. and in e end.. u get nth either. when u realised tt e one u used to be with is e right one.. e person who can give u happiness.. the person is already gone.. den why? why waste the time to go look for someone who has e qualities which ur other half doesnt possess? unless ur other half ill-treats u or smth.. den another matter.. otherwise jus be satisfied with what u have. so long as the feeling is there.. everything is all right.. den no point giving a simple, pure love up for smth else..
think abt it guys.. what do u all think?
shweet dreams;
2:18 PM
