mercredi, octobre 15, 2003
ok... jus read a mail sent to me by someone 2 months ago... really touched by what he wrote that time... but things now werent the same anymore... stuffs that he wrote wont come true anymore... but i m glad that at least i still have him as a fren.... a good fren.. a close fren... someone whom i can relate to easily... really cherish him... and like him too... ha.. but not like to the extent that i love him.. lol.. if u love someone easily.. then there's a problem that lies in u liao.. hmm... i also dunno lah.. but i do hope that we can be like the past.. go home and go sch together... but sad to say.. he might not agree to it... hope that we can study together.. he said he wanna study alone in the cafe or smth... it's ok... all my hopes are dashed... but at least he did smth that he likes... =) hope that after all that happens... it wont affect the way we talk to each other ya??
ok.. dun think i'll be in a very very good mood for the next few days or weeks.. or a month... have a feeling of isolating myself liao... cyc told me not to... but today.. i already did not tok much... went to sch.. kept quiet... tok a lil when have to... smile smile.. but did not laugh.... then when studying during break... my frens and i were like sitting a lil far apart from one another... then during lecture.. we went to the link up.. where there'll be many extra spaces... my frens and i took alternate seats... then skipped HAP lecture... and went home wif jeremy... roy asked me to go play pool wif him... aiyo... i told him to ask jeremy.. if jeremy going then mayb i go.. if not i go home... jeremy said he dun wanna go.. so i din go.. max said... dun believe him (roy).. he wants ppl to accompany.. haha.. but i also feel tired mah.. so i guessed i might as well go home... in the end.. roy did go for a game of pool... he expert in pool... and the three girls from his class went to play too.. i? too tired.. din go... dunno whether if i m too tired.. or is thinking too much... or there's too many things occupying my brain.... i almost tripped and fell twice today... first time was at bedok mrt station.. we have to climb 4 steps to the escalator.. and my left leg dunno did not lift high enuff or what.. hit the steps... and almost fell.. lucky jeremy next to me.. i quickly grab his hand.. he also kena shock... he was toking on the phone.. if i did not grab his hand.. i think my ankle will be sprained by now... then the second time was when i was walking past the security guard house... going home... then there's this slab not put properly... i kicked onto it... and again.. almost fell... i always walk halfway will bcome like that one... never open my eyes big big to see the steps... haiz... mayb i was thinking a lot at that time too.....
dunno lah... dunno what to do wif life now... have to be left alone to think abt all these things.... but still u guys can tok to me... haha.. wont get scolded one lah.. life is never smooth-sailing.. no matter how much i want it to be... i want my life to have everything my way.. but this will never happen... things that i hope and wish for... i really do hope it happens... though i have a feeling of that one or two of the hopes and wishes will come true... hope it really does...
life is really sucky at this point of time... dun think i'll get over it until the exams are over... but there's some other stuffs.. i dun think it'll be over until some years later.. (mayb)..... if that hopes and wishes come true.. then it'll not take a few years to get over liao... ha.. i also dunno.. i believe that time reveals and tells everything one needs to know... whatever that might happen in the future no one will know... but sometimes i have a feeling of what's going to happen to me b4 that thing happens.. and it's kind of always a good one.. a good feeling.. like say.. i always fail my eng test in sec sch.... i was so afraid that i'll fail the exam.. but i have this feeling telling me... that everything is already planned by God... and that i feel that i'll pass the eng exam.. and i did.. haaha.. and sometimes those stuffs i always dream abt stuffs that will come true.. most of my dreams come true.. how good.... really hope that it'll remain like this forever... having all my hopes and wishes and dreams come true... but most of it always come true.. so i hope these hopes and wishes are not exceptional.... i hope and wish for many many things... lol..
ok ba.. think i gtg... my fren bringing a camera on my grand presentation day.. hahaha... taking pics of everyone in formal wear... haha... it's next monday.. lol.. have been staring at the com for quite some days le... think it's time to stop coming too often le.. but it's confirm that i'll come online on fri night, sat ( if i am at home), and sunday late morning to evening)... ya.. so cya ..
ciao
shweet dreams;
6:53 PM
