samedi, octobre 25, 2003
hey U.. yes U.. look.. what i've been saying last night has nothing to do wif guys.. i meant girls and GIRLS ONLY!!! for whatever freaking reason i dunno.. i jus feel so inferior.. i know u said girls better not say "freaking" or "freak".. WHY SHLD I CARE??? i want to say it NOW. i wasnt talking abt guys yesterday and U told me to best forget abt u and try to ignore u.. is this what u want? i ask u now.. IS THIS WHAT U WANT? forgetting u is impossible.. ignoring u is difficult.. but that doesnt mean i cant do that.. I CAN IF I WANT TO.. but u'll regret..
not that i wanna rake up the past and say.. BUT I HAVE TO SAY!!! u said b4.. if wanna study together wif my frens or wanna study together.. u'll gladly come along.. but now? nvm.. i dun care abt that.. i also dunno what other past i wanna say.. cos i forgot most of it.. not worth remembering of now. freaking hell.. damn angry.. i've been taking things very easily now.. not getting worked up over guys.. but getting worked up bcos i feel inferior... U GET ME????
now whether or not i m going to be attached is not important ANYMORE!! after seeing what kinda girls u guys like.. i m kinda disappointed.. (dunno if it's right to say it.. but said it anyway)... i dunno what to say now.. but i've been having this feeling all along.. or rather once in a while.. a feeling which wasnt very good and that is.. U taking me for granted. i dunno if u have been taking me for granted or not.. but sometimes i do have the feeling.. pls tell me what u think.. i wanna hear ur view and what u've gotta say.. i dun wan anyone to lie to me.. i hate pple who lie to me.. so U pls tell me... 1) u really wanna me to forget and ignore U? 2) are u taking me for granted all along?
i've already trying my very best to treat u as jus a fren.. and i m already on my way to that.. i m already taking every thing so easily and i've never been able to do this b4.. but now i can.. for everything that happens.. i can take it easily now.. not jus the things that happened btwn us.. but also other things.. though it's not gonna be an easy task.. but i m on my way to that.. WHY?? cos.. i've already leave everything up to God.. i believe that He knows what's best for me and that He's have everything in plan for me.. I trust Him.. so that's why i m not feeling so worked up over guys now but worked up cos i feel so inferior to gals... U GET ME?????
anyway.. jus tell me and answer me those qn i posed to u here.. i really dun wanna lose u as a fren.. but if u want me to.. u do it urself.. i dun wanna lose u as a fren and that's it.. whatever that's gonna happen in future i dunno.. i jus leave everything to God.. ok i m feeling much better now.. u better come and tell me... i dun care.. have to come give me a reply...
i m not quarrelling wif u.. i know.. i said b4 i dun wanna quarrell wif u anymore.. but when there's smth that cant be resolved easily.. the best way is to talk abt it to each other and come to a conclusion.. and both parties must compromise.. though i might have said those things in an angry way.. but hope u'll understand that i m jus trying to get the msg passed over to u.. i m not quarrelling wif u ok? ha.. i feel funny if frens dun quarrell.. haha.. stupid me.. anyway.. better tell me ur answer..
shweet dreams;
10:45 AM
