lundi, septembre 15, 2003
from CK's diary (without his permission)...wallet? male? female?
Someone said,"Wallets are a lot like girls. You really have to take good care of, because if you won't, something might happen..."
I know what he means. I just lost a wallet, and I just lost a girl. You know, it's the exact same thing.
One day, you just realize it's gone. You try to look for it everywhere, even going back to the places where you could have lost it. You think, and you think hard, only to come upon a grim realization: it's really gone.
Of course, you can hold on to some hope. After all, there have been some very, very lucky (blessed?) people who get it back.
Perhaps you could become one of those people. You sit home and you hope that someone would call, and that you would get it back. But then, some time passes, and you realize that it's still gone, and you realize that it's time to let go.
The first few days, you turn to your friends for support. Some tell you you'll be ok, some tell you that it was your fault and that you should have been more careful, and some tell you about their own experiences. They give you all sorts of advice, none you haven't heard before.
You then go out to find a new wallet, only to realize that you don't really want a new one. You want the old one that you lost. No, you don't want all these better-looking wallets, you want yours, because of how comfortable it is, because of all the cards and pictures and other stuff in it.
You go out and carry on without a wallet, keeping your money in your pocket instead. You throw away stuff that you would have held on to if you had your old wallet. And then, finally, you find a new wallet you like and settle in.
You then start filling your new wallet, little by little. It still doesn't feel as comfortable as the old one, but it's getting there. Then you start putting in cards and pictures and other important stuff in the wallet. Soon enough, there's as much stuff in your new wallet as the old one. And then, after some time, you feel as comfortable with your new wallet.
And then you realize that you've almost forgotten you ever had your old wallet. Sure, you still remember most of the stuff you lost on that wallet. But then again, you don't remember the feeling of hurt that you felt when you lost it.
That's because that wallet you lost is no longer your wallet. You're no longer holding on. This new wallet you're holding, it has all the important cards and pictures and stuff that you need. This is your wallet.
And this time, you tell yourself, you're never losing this one.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Les hommes oublient, mais ne pardonnent jamais;
Les femmes pardonnent, mais n'oublient jamais.
Men forget, but never forgive;
Women forgive, but never forget.
[ Copied this whole blog from yiqian. i find this real true. one thing i can say now is that. dun lose the one u truely like for he/she might never come back. they might, they might not. well.. this kinda things is hard to say. i dunno... i feel really bad and sad now...
guys words cant be trusted.. and this is very true. to all gals out there... pls.. whatever a guy tells u pls dun believe it.. for it will never come true.. by believing it will only break your heart. ok? some of my frens dun even believe what their bf say... cos they themselve know that it'll never come true. and Jeremy said so too.. he also said never to believe what a guy say... cos they dun or rather seldom keep their promise. if they do.. u r lucky.. but this rarely happens. he himself also said that guys are all jerks.. can u believe it? he is a guy himself and still say guys are all jerks??? well.. i dunno.. all i can say now.. and is what i really wanna say deep down inside my heart is that guys' words cant be trusted. ya..
i'm sorry.. sorry that i din tok to u.. i know u feel sad and such.. but this is what i really have to do. dun feel bad or sad ok? u did nth wrong. if u do.. i'll also feel bad and sad too.. by not toking to you now.. i already is very sad.. feel like crying.. but i really have to do this. really.. i m sorry.. but i'll talk still.. this day when i talk to you will come.. it surely will.. only this way i can then know what i really want.. and what i really need. this day of me toking to you will come some day.. mayb tml.. mayb the day after.. mayb few days later.. mayb a week later.. mayb a month later.. mayb months later.. mayb next year.. mayb years later.. i dunno. but i know this day will surely come.. jus to add a lil of my mind. why care abt what others might think? jus do what u like. if u really dun wanna go home or sch or whatever together.. it's entirely up to u.. and most importantly is that.. i dun think it's that u r afraid of others getting the wrong impression or whatever.. it's U who is afraid of that gal seeing u and i together and tot that u r attached so when u wanna woo her... u are afraid that she'll reject and such. i dunno.. this is what i guess.. anyway.. going to sch or home together or not is not that impt to me now. all i can say now i m sorry and that i really have to do this.. and also guys' words cant be trusted. ya..
I'M SORRY
shweet dreams;
9:46 PM
